


A Game of Love and Greed

by Grimalkenkid



Series: Three Houses Potpourri [7]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Comedy, Gen, My Unit | Byleth Twins, Student My Unit | Byleth, no beta we die like Glenn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:15:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25704967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grimalkenkid/pseuds/Grimalkenkid
Summary: The moment Beleth and Bylese manifested the legendary Crest of Flames was the last time they knew peace... of the romantic kind, at least.(Written for the 3houseskinkmeme)
Series: Three Houses Potpourri [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1499483
Comments: 7
Kudos: 43





	A Game of Love and Greed

**Author's Note:**

> I just had to get this mess of a fic out here for y'all to enjoy. I'm not sure how long this will get, or if I'll even continue it at all, but I hope you enjoy this silly thing I wrote instead of sleeping.
> 
> Written for this prompt on the 3houseskinkmeme:  
> https://3houseskinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/476.html?thread=141276#cmt141276

Jeralt was getting real tired of walking into his office and seeing yet another pile of letters on his desk. He knew what the majority of them would say without even looking and was sorely tempted to just chuck the whole lot of them into the fireplace. But there was always the chance that one of them contained something worth reading, and so he dutifully grabbed the dagger which doubled as a letter-opener and sat down to sift through the multitude of marriage proposals.

Just as he suspected, the first in the pile smelled of lavender, the blooming pansy of House Edmund stamped into the wax seal.

> Lord Jeralt Reus Eisner,

_Well, that’s just all kinds of wrong,_ Jeralt thought, bemused by the idea of some poor scribe scrambling for the appropriate title for a high-ranking commoner.

> Captain of the Knights of Seiros

_At least they got that correct._

> and honored father of Beleth and Bylese Eisner

_And there it is… the thing they_ actually _care about._ He didn’t want to read any further than that, but his sense of duty, worn down though it was, urged him to see what this person thought important enough to write about.

> Word of your accomplishments has reached far and wide. Even among the Round Table Conference, there is seldom a day that goes by without mention of your esteemed name.

_You mean the Alliance lords stopped bickering long enough to talk about the mercs they hire? Next, you’ll tell me the caterers turned water to wine, and that the pies grew wings and flew off the table._

> However, your work with mercenary companies, honorable though it is, draws the eye to how the Captain of the Knights of Seiros falls to such desperation. That such an upstanding man as yourself has raised not one but two children alone in these circumstances is nothing to dismiss lightly.

_You’ve sure got an odd definition of the word “alone”... unless you don’t count common-born mercs as people. I bet that’s it, isn’t it?_

> It would indeed be a shame to see such potential squandered away as sellswords, and so I, Margrave Edmund, would like to extend an offer to you. My ward, Marianne von Edmund, is approaching marriageable age, and were she to be engaged to your son, Beleth Eisner, the union would bring nothing but benefits to both your holdings and my territory.

That was as far as Jeralt got before crumpling the paper up and chucking it into the fireplace. He didn’t need to read any more; he knew what it would say. Margrave Edmund would boast about the bounty of his lands, his influence within the Alliance, and a whole host of other things that Jeralt couldn’t give a rat’s ass about. He’d seen Marianne about the monastery, and she seemed a sweet enough girl. But if her father wanted her to marry Beleth, then he’d have to hope they fell in love the old-fashioned way. Jeralt wasn’t going to make decisions for his kids.

The next letter -- sealed with the Crest of Gautier -- was rather short, only one page long.

> Captain Eisner,

_Ah yes… The standard Kingdom greeting. Short and to the point._

> I pray this message finds you well.

_It didn’t._

> I will not waste time on platitudes or boasting. You are aware of who I am and the importance my House holds in the Kingdom’s defense. I am also keenly aware of my son’s reputation, but a joining of our bloodlines would be of great benefit to the people we are sworn to protect.
> 
> My request is thus: to arrange a marital union between my heir, Sylvain Jose Gautier, and your daughter, Bylese Eisner.

_Good fucking luck getting her to agree._

> You are no doubt inundated with similar requests,

Jeralt couldn’t help glancing over the stack of other letters, each with a different noble’s seal. _You’ve got that right, Gautier._

> but it is my hope that you will give thoughtful consideration to my offer. I await your reply and pray this letter actually reaches you, unlike my previous two attempts.

_Oh, those letters reached me, alright. Either it never occurred to you that I don’t feel like replying, or this is the most passive aggressive one yet._ With a smirk, Jeralt tucked the letter back into its envelope and stuck it in a random desk drawer. It would be good for a laugh later on.

Slowly, he worked his way down the pile of correspondences, chucking far more into the fire than not. He wasn’t even going to entertain the notion of arranging a marriage for one of his kids. Even if he were inclined to set something up -- which he wasn’t -- he knew that neither Bel nor By would stand idle and let themselves be wed to someone they had no feelings for. Sure, they may have only recently started showing their feelings, but Jeralt knew they weren’t the heartless warriors people said they were.

When he got to the last letter, Jeralt nearly breathed a sigh of relief. _Just one more,_ he told himself. _Just one more, and then you can get to your actual work._

Unfortunately, he groaned upon seeing the royal seal of Faerghus stamped into the wax seal. This wasn’t one he could just burn and forget about.

> Mister Eisner,

_That’s a new one. What game are you playing, Prince Dimitri?_

> May this letter find you in good health and better spirits.

_Too late._

> It is always a pleasure writing to an esteemed hero such as yourself. I am no great hero myself, but in the current, political climate, simply not being a villain is commendable.

Jeralt rolled his eyes. _Great start, kiddo. That just gives me_ heaps _of confidence…_

> Word has reached my ears that you have a daughter of marriageable age, and thus, being unwed myself, we have an opportunity to strengthen both of our respective Houses.

_You break every training lance you touch; you don’t_ need _to be any stronger._

> It is common practice to inform the father of one’s target of affection before courting begins, and so this letter is to inform you that that is exactly what I plan to do.

_Points for creativity, Your Highness. You’re the first person who didn’t ask_ me _for my kid’s hand in marriage._

> I understand that you may be wary of me, but I assure you that the rumors of my misadventures are greatly exaggerated. I look forward to meeting your daughter and you, as well.

_Heh,_ Jeralt snorted under his breath. The wording was stilted and far too formal for any normal kid, but this was exactly the kind of thing he expected the young prince to pull. It was almost adorable.

_… Wait…_

Jeralt went back over the last paragraph. _‘I look forward to meeting her’? They’ve been spending time together for months now!_

A quick glance at the letter’s signature confirmed his newly aroused suspicions.

> Holy Kingdom of Faerghus
> 
> Grand Duke of Itha, Prince Regent Rufus Aryn Blaiddyd

Jeralt just stared at the paper as he let his mind catch up to what his eyes just saw. Whatever fury he felt at seeing the infamous Whore of Fhirdiad declare his intent to court Bylese had circled around into chilling hate. For the first time that day, Jeralt grabbed his quill and quickly scribbled a reply.

> ~~Prince Whor~~ Grand Duke Rufus,
> 
> Kindly ~~FUCK O~~ delay your trip to Garreg Mach, as ~~I’m confident By doesn’t want your dick anywhere near h~~ you’re surely busy running the Kingdom and getting ready for ~~your nephew’s fucki~~ Prince Dimitri’s coronation. ~~In fact, never come here ev~~ We would be happy to receive you another time when things aren’t so busy.
> 
> If you wish to meet my daughter, ~~I will personally shove my lance somewhere the sun don’t sh~~ I will let her know.
> 
> Thank you for the polite correspondence,
> 
> Captain Jeralt Reus Eisner

Needless to say, Seteth looked quite startled when Jeralt stomped into his office and slapped an envelope on his desk. “Make sure this gets to Itha Keep,” he growled before stomping right back out.

Jeralt was really, really tired of all these damn letters.


End file.
